I am writing this to inform you about something i noticed whilst minding my own business in a supermarket.
Upon my regular wander around the aisles I realised an unbelievable thing in the vegetable section.
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What I Noticed...
I was looking at the cucumbers, the harmless green lengthy vegetable, and to my utter disbelief I saw a few cheap but larger versions of the cucumber.
Of the many fake cucumbers in circulation I have found the two worst offenders. I shall now bring them to your attention.
I have found the most common fraud to be found under the name "marrow". This can be easily spotted due to the fact that it is much larger than the cucumber and tastes nowhere near as nice.
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I don't know who this girl is....She scares me
The "marrow" usually costs more than the cucumber, so if you come across these then beware. Do not be confused by these strange plants. They are perfectly healthy to eat but it is not reccomended due to the fact that it tastes minging. Most of these "marrows" are usually found naked in gangs towards the end of aisles, while the cucumbers are stacked and wrapped in plastic, therefore defenceless against the evil "marrow".
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More forgery
Unfortunately, the "marrow" is not the only offender trying to steal the business from the cucumber. The "courgette" is another, and actually better, forgery. The "courgette" is a fake that is in fact very similar, in size as well as looks. It is usually, like the cucumber, found in plastic wrapping. But beware, the "courgette" is a more dangerous criminal than the "marrow". It has an even nastier flavour and it is much harder than the cucumber. The "courgette" is also much cleverer than any other forgeries. It has an alias.
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Zucchini
Across the Atlantic Ocean, in a small place, known by the locals as America, the "courgette" is running amok among grocery stores. It is known there as the "zucchini".
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Watch out
So, please, for the good of mankind, boycott sales of "courgettes", "marrows" and "zucchinis". They are a disgrace.
So keep safe, and watch out for the evil green vegetables.
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Also, watch out for "aubergines" or "egg-plants" as they are just wannabe "marrows" but they do not have the right colour.
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